Now thickly nestled in November, Thanksgiving right around the bend, it may seem odd to revisit Halloween. But always an important day for geeks (being able to walk the streets freely in your Boba Fett replica armor) I think it would be remiss of me to let All Hallows Eve 2009 go by without giving it a proper Top 10 list from yours truly. Halloween has certainly come and gone, but every year I come back to the same question. A question that follows not just Halloween, but every holidy. Every year my thoughts drift to the 24th century and as I hand out candy I can’t help but wonder – is there still Halloween in the 24th century? By Star Trek: The Next Generation it seems there is barely any kind of organized religion left on Earth, let alone one started by pagans. I guess why would you need to dress up and play pretend once a year when you’ve got yourself an ever-lovin’ holodeck at your disposal. And maybe the looming threat of Borg invasion kinda takes all the terror out of a ghost story. As it is with space exploration, where there are wonders unimaginable, there also lay horrors that will haunt your soul. Sights you can’t unsee and monsters that seem born of your very nightmares. I love being scared, more specifically I love being creeped out. I love the chills, I love that uneasy feeling, I relish that psychological “eyes in the darkness.” Nothing forces me to sleep with the lights on more than a slow burn into horror. Captain Jean-Luc Picard and the intrepid crew of the USS Enterprise-D faced and discovered all these things out in the cold blackness of space. I know what you’re thinking, what does TNG have to do with Halloween? TNG isn’t scary, unless you count those first season uniforms. This is where we differ (but not on those first season uniforms). I grew up watching the Next Generation, learned a lot of important lessons, including that “damn” and “hell” were perfectly acceptable swear words, and found that even Star Trek could give you the creeps. These, as my Geeky Halloween tribute, are:

THE TOP 10 CREEPIEST EPISODES OF STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION:

(YE BE WARNED: THERE BE SPOILERS AHEAD)

#10. “Clues” – Season 4, Episode 87

Now this episode begins with the entire crew, save for Data, passing out and reawakening after thirty seconds. They think nothing of it, get checked out by Crusher and continue on their way. Suddenly though, Picard and the crew begin to realize that little things on the ship aren’t making any sense. Just little things here and there that seem to be out of place with logic. Dr. Crusher’s plants have grown rapidly, and Worf has a hurt wrist, that when scanned appears that it was at one point broken and treated without his knowledge. Picard becomes intrigued by these events and soon realizes Data is acting strange as well.

Now, this is one of my favorite episodes of TNG, especially for the creep factor it has. Memory loss, missing time are all things I find to be chilling. Finding pieces of a puzzle here and there, putting them together slowly, to see a malevolent force at work is definitely something that creeps me out. The weird factor upped by Data’s suspicious behavior, and ominous answers to Picard’s questions. The ending is satisfying with a wonderful speech by Picard, and like most darker episodes of TNG, has a happy ending, if not a tad creepy unto itself.

#9. “Remember Me” – Season 4, Episode 79

One of the very few Dr. Crusher-centric episodes of the entire series, this one has always stood out as probably my favorite. The story is simple enough, crew members aboard the Enterprise begin disappearing, but only Crusher can remember who they were, it’s as if they’ve been wiped from existence. It becomes a race against time to figure out what is going on as more and more crew members vanish.

This one was always scary to me for a very simple reason – vanishing from existence. Everything you did everything you were, blinked from existence. Is there anybody who isn’t afraid of being forgotten? It speaks to a very deep seated fear in humans, that after we’re gone no one will remember us, our lives so inconsequential that we might as well have never have been. Effecting no lasting impression on those around us and the world we live in only to be completely erased from life itself. We all hope that when we die, we will live through the memories of others because if we are forgotten, then we will truly be gone.

Yes, there is another Dr. Crusher episode that you may argue is more scary. “Sub Rosa” (season 7, episode 166) which is about Dr. Crusher attending her grandmother’s funeral, and spending time in her “haunted house.” I don’t find this episode creepy, frankly, and it has always been one of my least favorite episodes of TNG. I think it’s boring, and kind of goofy. This is where the creepy factor just didn’t translate very well, it was about ghosts and haunted houses in a hardcore science fiction show.  It felt like a script for another show that TNG just happened to pick up. “Remember Me,” on the other hand, is fantastic and real stand-out episode for Dr. Crusher.

#8. “Frame of Mind” – Season 6, Episode 147

An episode that messes with the mind of the audience is always going to be a fun ride.  One of the trippier episodes of TNG, “Frame of Mind” begins with Commander Riker rehearsing a play being put together by Dr. Crusher about a man trapped in an insane asylum. But the fun really begins as fantasy becomes reality. Riker actually is insane and locked in an asylum, the Enterprise and his friends a psychotic delusion, at least that’s what the doctors would have him believe. Riker goes back and forth between these two realities, never knowing which is real and which is a figment of his imagination, and we the audience are never sure either.

The best part of this episode is probably the first half where Riker seems to be going out of his mind. I always love when they put Riker in these bizarre situations, like “First Contact” or “Future Imperfect,” and this one is no different. What I find the creepiest about this episode is that he really does seem to be going insane and no one will help him or, more accurately, can help him. That is a horrifying state, to be losing your mind and no one can help. To see yourself losing grip on reality, the helplessness of that situation is one many people can understand. Of course by the end of the episode the lies are unwoven and the truth is exposed in a very Star Trek way, but the initial spiral into madness is a well done and incredibly eerie.

#7. “Identity Crisis” – Season 4, Episode 92

When I was a kid this was one of my all time favorite episodes, basically because Geordi was our focus and he rarely got an episode that revolved mainly around him. Most of the time he was paired with Data, who besides Picard, probably had the most episodes focused on him. The story of this episode is that an old colleague of Geordi’s, Lt.Cmdr. Leijten, comes on board the Enterprise. The two of them had gone on an away mission together with a few other officers years ago and apparently all of the others have gone missing. They’re the only two left. Suddenly Leijten begins going through a transformation into some kind of creature. Geordi takes it upon himself to investigate just why this seems to be happening to the members of this away team, and if he may be next.

I found this episode particularly creepy mainly because of Geordi’s investigation. Using the holodeck he recreates the away mission and notices a shadow that doesn’t belong to any of the officers. A shadow in the shape of a man. This alone is just creepy as hell, and always gave me the chills as Geordi discovers that he and his team were not alone on that dark planet just as he himself begins to change.

#6. “Masks” – Season 7, Episode 169

I had a tough time placing this episode on the list. This episode always gives me the willies, most of which I think has to do with Brent Spiner’s performance. Spiner could play freaky and evil like nobody else. I don’t know if it was just the combination of the pale skin and yellow eyes, but when Data was not acting like himself, when he was merely a puppet to whatever force was controlling, damn was he terrifying.

This episode saw an ancient culture forcing itself from out of extinction, turning the Enterprise literally into a jungle. An almost Mayan-like alien culture begins to emerge ruled by a vicious sun goddess, and as Data says, “Masaka is waking.” It seems that an entire civilization has been downloaded into Data’s positronic mind, giving him a sort of multiple personality disorder

Data’s possession by this civilization and its supposedly all powerful, malevolent Goddess is what gives this episode it’s creepiness and what cements its spot as number six on my list. Spiner’s performance, as a being from another time, a being with immense power it could unleash at any moment is what really gives this episode an edge.

#5. “Phantasms” – Season 7, Episode 158

Another creepy Data episode, this one has to do with one of my personal favorite fears – nightmares. Months earlier Data discovered that a “dream program” within his positronic brain has been activated. Data doesn’t need to sleep, but in an effort to explore what it means to be human he has begun this new venture. Nine months into his “experiment” Data begins having disturbing nightmares that include being ripped apart, Dr. Crusher drinking from a straw coming out of Riker’s temple, and Worf eating a living Deanna Troi cake. Data begins acting erratic and eventually violent to the point of stabbing Deanna (a rather violent sequence reportedly edited out of the British airing). No one can understand his behavior until they decide to hook his “subconscious” up to the holodeck and have a peak themselves as to what’s going on when Data dreams.

The end solution to the puzzle returns us to the world of Star Trek, the creepiness gone, but this episode is still fantastic for the disturbing imagery and nagging feeling that it all means something, even if that something is terrifying.

#4. “Conspiracy” – Season 1, Episode 25

One of the only episodes broadcasted with a warning for content. “Conspiracy” is easily one of the best episode of the first season and a creepy, Star Trek, take on a classic sci-fi theme. Alien possession, mind control, paranoia, this one had it all. Fairly unlike any episodes of the series at the time, this early gem really hit a bulls-eye in its creepiness. The story goes, simply put, that the bizarre behavior of high-ranking officers lead Picard to uncover a sinister alien conspiracy within Starfleet. One of my favorite sci-fi thrillers of all time is Carpenter’s “The Thing” and this episode plays heavily on the idea of not being able to trust that anyone is who they say they are.

Starting with a secret meeting from some of Starfleet’s finest warning Picard of a hidden danger lurking within Starfleet, this one is a nice slow build to the real horror that comes in maybe the last twenty minutes of the episode. The good stuff really begins with Admiral Quinn’s sudden Bob Barker-like beatdown on Riker, culminating in the discovery of a wriggling tail protruding from the Admiral’s neck. From this, Crusher discovers a parasite inside the old man, latched onto his brain. Picard, meeting with a few other Admirals and Lt.Cmdr. Remmick back on earth, treads lightly until it’s time for dinner where they unveil the main course, a bowl full of mealworms. Probably the best part of the episode, for me, is an uncharacteristically gory look at the Mother Parasite living within Remmick, his body burning open, revealing the grotesque creature inside. I don’t think there’s been a more graphic scene in TNG then the headless, hollowed out chest cavity of Remmick sitting in that chair. Also a favorite of mine for probably the most ominous, creepy ending in the entire series: a shot of vast, empty space, the alien parasite’s homing beacon broadcasting into the blackness from earth. They know where we are.

#3. “Schisms” – Season 6, Episode 131

How can you do a sci-fi show without playing with the idea of alien abductions? One of my favorite areas of interest as a kid was aliens and specifically alien abductions. Of course I was into all areas of the paranormal, but alien abductions were my favorite. I found them simultaneously horrific and wonderful, as with varying reports they could be either. But the idea of being experimented on, being watched by cold, black eyes was a horror I could never imagine, and frankly never wanted. Sure I’ve always wanted to see a ghost, but no matter how much I love aliens, I never want to be abducted from my bed in the middle of the night. The helplessness, the violation of an alien abduction is what I find the most chilling. That’s why “Schisms” will always stand out to me as a real piece of horror in Star Trek: The Next Generation.

Crew members on the Enterprise are having terrible nights sleep. They are unrested and are even freaking out at the littlest things. As if they are having flashbacks to some kind of trauma. Finally some of the crew get together and try to sort out these episodes on the holodeck where they are able to reconstruct a kind of surgery table complete with disturbing implements of torture. They discover that they have been the subjects of alien abduction. The blunt horror of this fact alone and the slow revelation of this is what will always chill me to the bone.

#2. “Genesis” – Season 7, Episode 171

One of the very first episodes I ever saw, this one always stuck with me and thoroughly freaked the hell out of me so much that it was a while before I ever went back to it. The story is that Captain Picard and Data return to the Enterprise to find the rest of the crew have de-evolved into primitive forms of life, depending on what they’re DNA may be holding.

That description really doesn’t do this episode the slightest bit of justice. Everyone’s de-evolution is so strange and disturbing, but the winner here really is Worf who sprays VENOM into Dr. Crusher’s eyes at one point and bites Troi’s face, marking her for mating! The venom thing gets me every time, check it out at the 8 minute mark. The screams of excruciating pain never cease to make me cringe and just feel so bad for Crusher. When I was a kid and first saw that, I thought Worf had killed her. It just sounded so horrific, and it still does. Not to linger on this scene but, even Nurse Ogawa says that she’ll need RECONSTRUCTIVE SURGERY, he freakin melted her FACE OFF! Anywho, when Picard and Data return to the ship it’s drifting, just twirling in space, dark and ominous. Dwight Schultz, who plays the always awesome Barclay, has one of the best and most disturbing transformations, next to Worf’s Klingon beast of course. But Barclay’s particularly freaked me out as a kid. I really don’t want to spoil any more of this episode, but the fear and anxiety is really packed on in such a brilliant way, I had a very hard time not putting “Genesis” as number one.

#1. “Night Terrors” – Season 4, Episode 91

This is it! My number one creepiest episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation, and perhaps to you TNG fans out there, you’re not the least surprised. Maybe it’s a little predictable, but I can not think of an episode creepier, or just plain scary as “Night Terrors.” When I first watched this episode as a kid it scared the bejeezus out of me, and to this day if I watch this one by myself, door closed, house empty, all alone, it still scares the crap out of me.

The Enterprise gets stuck by a binary star attempting to find the USS Brittain, a science vessel that’s gone missing. They finally find it only to discover the entire crew is dead except for the ship’s Betazoid (a telepath) counselor who’s catatonic. After a few days of investigation, Crusher discovering the crew all died by each other’s hands, and Data and Geordi discovering the ship itself is in perfect condition decide to move along and report to Starfleet. Unfortunately there’s one little problem – they can’t move. No matter how hard they try the ship will not budge and inch, just like the Brittain.

Soon they discover that the crew is having a hard time sleeping, gradually to the point where something is apparently interrupting their REM cycle of sleep. Without REM sleep the brain can’t function and the entire crew begins to have horrific and terrifying hallucinations. Some even begin acting violent and suicidal. Picard hallucinates that the turbolift is collapsing on him, Riker sees snakes in his bed, and Dr. Crusher sees the dead bodies in the morgue sitting straight up, still covered by their white sheets in what I find to be the most terrifying scene in this episode. Without REM sleep, the entire crew will all eventually go completely insane. Besides Crusher’s hallucination, this episode also has one of my favorite ideas in horror, given to Counselor Troi. The idea of looking into the mirror and your reflection not being your own, it’s you but at the same time there’s a stranger staring back at you, this is something that gives me chills even as I type the words.

The descent into madness, the nightmarish visions, and Troi’s own dreams of “eyes in the dark” culminate in making this the most creepy, eerie, and straight up scariest episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation. I hope everyone gets a chance to check this episode out because it will always stand out for me as a brilliant episode where Star Trek wasn’t just about the wonders and courageousness of space exploration, but also the horrors that sneak up on you when you least suspect it.